The South Koreans knew what Donald Trump’s supporters stood for. They were a money grabbing, Bible-thumping, greenhouse gassing, missile firing, seal clubbing, oil drilling club whose idea of a good time was to practise firing on gay parades.
On the other hand, North Koreans even approved of some of these practices especially missile firing. As a result, they made up for having no money to grab and no gay parades to fire upon by religiously threatening their neighbours, except China and Russia, with imminent extermination.
You could say it was consistent. North Korea consistently threatened, bullied and hectored its neighbours, most of whom simply ignored the republic and went on making their nations better places for their citizens
North Korea today is the most repressive, the most authoritarian and one of the most consistently famine-stricken nations in the world. South Korea, the nation the North invaded in 1950 because it thought it would win, is currently 54 times richer than its northern neighbour and is ranked among the world’s affluent.
The North’s current leader is the grandson of the rocket scientist who thought nothing of invading his southern neighbour all those years ago. Clearly, the apple hadn’t fallen far from the tree.
That’s because said grandson, Kim Jong-Un, who dubbed himself Supreme Leader, thought nothing of sending hit men to Malaysia, a friendly country, to assassinate his enemies.
When a Malaysian court extradited said hit man to the US, an enraged SL broke off diplomatic relations with Malaysia, an act that enraged all North Korean diplomats in Kuala Lumpur because they knew, with foreboding, that while it was certainly a farewell to nasi lemak, it was likely to be even worse.
Supreme Leader loved US basketball, bourbon and burgers which was why he was overweight and suffered perpetual bad hair days. But he was also a plump predator who thought he deserved everything he stole and knew that Larry Hagman was right: the only rules to live by was never to be caught in bed with a live man or a dead woman.
He also thought he should Lead by Ruthlessness and once reduced a defence chief to a smear by ordering him executed by anti-aircraft fire. The reason, according to South Korean TV, was a lamentable error by the chief: he dozed off during a particularly tedious SL speech.
Something new this way comes and it’s called K-pop, a cultural phenomenon out of South Korea that’s become hugely influential globally and threatens to change the way North Koreans think.
Standout example: Korean boy band BTS is the most popular group in the world and the first since the Beatles to have three number 1 hits on the Billboard Hot 100.
Fat Boy was horrified and has labelled K-pop a “vicious cancer” that’s corrupting his country’s youth. Meanwhile, his people were consuming South Korean movies, K-dramas and K-pop videos with an abandon that terrified the tubby terminator.
Kim knew that his people had to be weaned off the stuff as it portrayed the South as an attractive alternative. Worse, K-pop content encourages thinking, self-expression and individuality, all themes that were inimical to SL’s obey-or-else tendencies.
The stout slaughterer’s response has been typical: he imposed harsh punishments like 15 years in a labour camp for listening to K-pop and death for those smuggling the videos in from the south.
It isn’t clear if he will prevail. History has always bet on the former when the popular will comes up against the dictatorial won’t.