Virus – a Latin term in medicine meaning, “your guess is as good as mine.” 

In 1988, President George Bush – the father, not the son – campaigned on a “things are looking up” plank. In fact, his theme song was Bobby McFerin’s   Don’t Worry, Be Happy. 

All that cheerful warbling is, of course, easier said than done when it comes to health. There is Murphy’s Law, for one thing. 

Then, there are statistics. They can be devilishly tricky. Or as Steve Martin put ii, “Somewhere out there is…the world’s worst doctor… and he could be yours.”

It’s best not to take chances.  Example: Take one apple every eight hours: it’ll keep three doctors away. 

More seriously, and going completely by anecdotal evidence, one gets the impression cancer cases are rising. Indeed, this was a casual observation by a friend the other day and it got me thinking. 

He’s right. 

And it’s a disturbing worldwide trend where new cancer cases among young people have been increasing sharply.

According to a 2024 study, early-onset cancers, defined as cancer cases diagnosed in people under 50, increased globally by a staggering 79%. 

Even so, the vast majority of cases are in older people. Standout gloomy fact: one in two people will develop some form of cancer during their lifetime.

On a more cheery note, Malaysia is not on the list of the 50 most cancer-prone countries in the world. This ranking is based on nations with the highest number of cases per 100,000. 

The bulk of these countries are, for want of a better word, Caucasian. This is, most likely, traceable to skin cancers from sunlight. Not surprisingly, Australia comes in at the top of the list. 

Incidentally, skin cancers generally have the least fatal outcomes. Or, to quote a doctor friend of mine: “If you had to have cancer, you’d be best served with skin.” OK, a bit Hannibal Lecter-esque but there you are. 

But I digress. We were talking high risk countries weren’t we?   

The first Asian country on the list is South Korea (14) followed, surprisingly, by Singapore (42). We should not leap to any conclusions, of course, but it’s not looking good for kim-chi.

As for countries with the lowest cancer rates, the top five are, in order, Japan, Finland, Sweden, Iceland and Norway.

Scientists think the Japanese diet, which is high in vegetables, salmon and green tea, explains this finding.  Meanwhile, the low levels of sunlight and the diets – fish – in the other, mainly-Caucasian, countries help explain their relatively low rates.

The good news is that Asian and Pacific islanders have the lowest risk of cancer in the world. The bad news is that they are more susceptible to liver and bowel tumours.   

The best defence against the scourge is, apparently, regular exercise, non-obesity and a good diet – green tea and Omega-3-rich foods like salmon. 

Regular  check-ups don’t hurt: the prognosis, after early detection, is almost always excellent. 

Cancer is so dreaded the world over that it took Woody Allen to put it in perspective: “The most beautiful words in the English language are not “I love you” but … “benign.”

But to avoid cancer altogether, one must not age. And for that to happen, regular naps are counselled, especially while driving. 

ENDS